Moving is never easy. Even for someone like me who has moved around quite a bit growing up; moving is always just a mess of emotions. While I was excited about the prospect of moving to somewhere new, getting out of my small town of Nampa, Idaho, and starting a new chapter in the journey of my husband and mine’s marriage, I was heartbroken to leave behind my family, friends, and all things familiar or convenient. There was so much transition going on that for a while, I wondered if I was going to make it. I love school, so the thought of going back to school and “nerding” out over psychology and other aspects of academia was very enticing. However, the last two weeks before this move were a crazy, high intensity time in my life.
When my husband and I had talked about how in the world we were going to get out to Boston, we were pretty discouraged. We had built up quite the collection of junk over the past year. We decided it would be best for us to sell everything except clothing, textbooks, art supplies (for my husband), and a few other memory things we had from the past year. We got boxes and started shipping everything out to my mother-in-law, who had told us that we would be welcome to live with her until we found a place. My father-in-law was also very generous to buy us plane tickets to get out to Boston a week and a half before school would start. However, while these different gifts were very much appreciated, I still had so much emotional turmoil going on inside. I was beyond anxious.
I had given my work notice as soon as I found out about school and they were very supportive. Since working as a psychosocial rehabilitationist for the past 5 months, I had built strong connections with my clients and was not looking forward to our final termination sessions. When I had first talked to a lot of my “kiddos,” they were pretty upset. A lot of them cried but thought that I would be coming back after a little while to continue PSR with them. It was hard to explain to them that I might never come back to Idaho and that they would have to continue their progress with a new PSR worker. A lot of them tried to resist this change by acting out or behaving how they would when we first started. It was so frustrating to try and continue to work on their goals while discussing the reality of me not being there in a week. I got through a lot of it okay and only cried after two clients had been dropped off for the day.
If leaving work wasn’t enough, I had to hold a two day yard sale to sell my husband and my things. It was so hard to sell a lot of the things at the yard sale. Some of the things sold were memories from my childhood, wedding presents, gifts from loved ones, and other things that had a strong emotional tie to the past year. My husband and I had done a lot of moving since we got married. We were a fast paced kind of couple, getting married one day and then moving to Northern California the next. After 6 months there, we ran out of money and support of friends out there and decided to move back to Idaho. Idaho is a beautiful place to live. It has beautiful rivers, waterfalls, places to hike and enjoy nature, and a recently growing metropolis in Boise, 30 minutes away from where we lived. However, my husband and I felt suffocated and needed to get out. I wanted to go back to grad school and decided that MSPP would be a great choice since I had applied and was accepted when I graduated NNU back in May of 2010. So, I applied and was accepted again, which seemed to be a good move for my husband and me since we had family in Boston.
On top of that, I was trying to fit in time to hang out with my close friends as well as my family. My sister was leaving a week before me to go to Peru and doing nursing work for a while with an outreach program. My sister is my best friend. Yes, we fight like normal siblings, but I know that she always has my best interests in mind. So leaving her behind in Idaho was heartbreaking; even more so than the time we left for California. The last two weeks in Idaho were some of my funnest memories of my time being back there. While it was hard to say goodbye, I knew that all of my friends were only a phone call, a text, or a Facebook message away. The day my husband and I were to fly out of Idaho, my mom and I could barely hold it together. I’m such a “mama’s-girl.” I love my family so, so much that the thought of being so far away was almost physically painful. My mom reassured me and hugged me through every step of the way. When I started going through airport security, I was anxious, nervous, scared, and sad; but, even through all that pain and depressing emotions, I knew that everyone was proud of me for taking this next step in my journey and loved me no matter where I was.
So, yes, moving is hard. However, you’ll never know how much the next step will edify your life if you don’t take the chance. A life without risk is hardly a life at all. So, I’ve taken the leap across the country and have arrived in Boston, ready and willing to take the next step in this wild journey of mine, whether it comes easily or not.